By Jessie Stracener
Breakups suck. It is a sad but very true state of human existence that every relationship must have a beginning and an ending. Sometimes these relationships end too quickly. People get snatched out of our lives long before we are ready and sometimes they stay in our lives long past when it would have been better to have ended a connection. When it comes to romantic relationships that end due to breakups, few are ever happy. Endings are scary, and rarely ever at the right time for everybody involved. If you do have to suffer through such an ending, here are some tips to keep you from feeling the breakup blues.
1. Lean on Loved Ones
The best way to recover from a relationship ending is to reach out to friends and family, even, or maybe especially, ones you might have lost touch with. Let them support you. Lean on them; that is what they are there for. Instead of wallowing in self pity and eating gallons of ice cream alone, invite your friends over. They will listen to you complain and help you eat the ice cream. It can be tempting to dive into new relationships, but that doesn’t always bring us what we need during this time of healing. But rarely do we regret leaning on friends. Friends don’t judge and chances are you will be comforting them through a breakup one day, if you haven’t already.
2. Have Fun
This will sound simple, but have fun. Life is too short to be miserable because something ended when you could be enjoying the beginning of something else. Being alone is not a bad thing. Sometimes it can be the best thing. Go out and do exciting and fun things and don’t feel guilty about it. Having fun doesn’t mean that you miss that person any less, or that you don’t wish things might have been different, but it will keep you from sitting at home, alone, with that ever-tempting ice cream. Go see a local band, invite some friends to see a movie, go try something new! It doesn’t matter. Just have fun.
3. Focus on You
Don’t forget to take care of yourself. Sometimes, when we are dealing with loss or emotional stress, we forget to take care of ourselves. We don’t eat like we know that we should and we don’t want to get up off the couch and exercise because wallowing can be a powerful temptation…resist. Get outside and breathe the fresh air. Even if you aren’t a runner or you don’t like to hit the gym, you’ll feel the benefits of just walking around your neighborhood. Occasionally, hanging out in your pajamas on the couch is fine, but it is easy to fall into the habit which doesn’t help your self-esteem and doesn’t make you feel any better in the long run.
4. Set Goals
This is the best time to set goals for yourself. Make a list of things that you want to accomplish. What do you want out of life? What do you want out of the next month? Year? We all need something to look forward to, something to work toward, and what better time to plan what you want than when you don’t have another person around to fit into those plans?
Be happy! Time heals, sometimes it takes a lot of time, but eventually we will all be alright.
I am a happily married 24-year-old woman living in the heart of the south. By day I work primarily with children or doing some sort of clerical work. I’m an ace with excel spreadsheets and bandaging “boo boos”. I’ve had nearly every job you could think of and I have enjoyed most of them, from working at a museum, library, Microbiology lab, and a Music studio to being a birthday clown, a tutor, and pretty much anything else you can think of. I love to sew, cross stitch, embroider, and work with beads and wire to make awesome trees. I will try crafting anything at least once. I also love to read. I will read nearly anything. I also like to cook when I have the time.